Chris Christie You Are An Amateur

I am not a bully
After living in Alaska where fraud, corruption, bullying and unethical behavior reign supreme an education in the techniques governors like Sarah Palin and Sean Parnell use to cover their asses so their corruption is not uncovered is obtained by osmosis. A key component of their corruption is systems to hide the evidence that implicates them. People in Alaska work in a group to bully or mob those who disagree with them so this makes it easy for the overlords to mobilize their authoritarian, right wingy, dominionist warriors to assist in large numbers no matter what their status is. When these nefarious posers are exposed they resign and take up residence on the series of tubes to try and change perceptions about them. Like the troll after former Attorney General Talis Colberg resigned, who wrote the same post everywhere and I mean everywhere that Colberg was the most honest man the troll had ever known. That troll hated my guts, well hates my guts. The right wing in Alaska fell for it because they are easily manipulated, love to vote for psychopaths and cheer them for their evil deeds wishing they could be in a position to bully more people or get away with a higher level of corruption than say something like housing subsidy fraud. Governor Christy what the hell were you thinking? Call the Department of Lawlessness in Alaska and Sarah Palin’s lawyers to ask for some advice in this area. Call Sean Parnell, his heart is even blacker than Sarah Palin’s.


Grumpy Wildstein.

Grumpy cat.

1.You got one thing right, always lie your ass off when you get caught, this will take more work than most people considering your ass, but really by now your ass should be non-existent with all the lies you have told. Of course blaming other people is essential. You seem to have that technique down. There is however the problem of those who have been scapegoated popping up to bite you in the ass. Remember you are the victim here.

Chris Christy looking innocent.
2. Do your best to make statements which sound to you like what an honest person would say such as apologies and claims you have been blindsided. Try to look innocent and keep talking bullshit because to the right bullshit and truth are the same thing. You had nothing to do with the bridge closing, those other bad, bad people did it without your knowledge, apparently the whole damn bunch without your knowledge. Work on retaliation behind the scene, if you can get the courts and attorney general to threaten a wrongful arrest or even an investigation that taints their careers you can control them. While you’re at it torture their pets, they love to do that when they wrongfully arrest people in Alaska.

Stock exchange or corporate owned politicians, same ilk.
3. Appoint people on the Narcissistic Personality Disorder-Psychopathy Continuum to serve as your staff,  to run agencies and of course this selection method works well for judges and magistrates. That is essential, but the clueless are also helpful, the problem with them is when confronted they may fold and spill their guts perhaps even getting someone to write a book for them. Threatening the clueless is easy, simply find something you can hold over them. Running a prostitution ring yourself gives you great opportunities to do this. Of course law enforcement agencies must protect you all the way to the top for this to work, including blocking senate sub-committee investigations.  I can personally provide evidence that law enforcement in Alaska is corrupt, destroys evidence, bullies whistleblowers or complainers of criminal activity and lies, lies, lies all the way to the top. When it is widespread and SOP you don't have to bother even asking them to lie for the governor, they know they will lose their jobs if they don't. Use Dr. Hare’s psychopathy checklist and only pick those who score high. I don’t know your system of selecting judges in New Jersey, but here in Alaska appointing people with a bit of the crazy to the Judicial Council helps to ensure the courts will be staffed with the right corrupt right wing dominionist judges.

I have no idea who this bastard is, I can't even find him in my HS yearbook.
4. There is a reason you picked your old friends from high school to serve on your staff, they hung out with you and know what a bastard you are so they won‘t cross you. Denying you even know them is of course essential and you did. Throwing them under the bus was automatic for you when you got caught in a scandal, you have that one down pat. Sarah Palin still has appointees from Wasilla, especially those she went to high school with covering her surgically altered ass.

5. Know that you can divert the attention of those on the left due to the comedy factor of this issue, but keep lying because then the right will have a “truth” to focus on since truth and lies are the same to them. After all you function as a crooked politician on their inability to find even a glaring truth. 

6.Make sure all staff know ahead of time that if they screw up the conspiracy by using email, texting or leaving recorded messages that can be obtained by disgusting interfering investigators they will be the scapegoats and be fired for being so stupid.

When your ex-half-gov goes to work for this guy, nuff said.
7. Threaten the news media with no access to the governor's office if they cross you and print negative material. They had better be on your side if they want any "news" from you. Have them repeat over and over that they can't write a story about corruption unless someone is charged with a crime. What the hell Christy, it seems there are independent journalists who actually dig for facts and try to report the news on the East Coast. You should have taken residence in a place like Alaska, where everything is half-assed and backwards, those in power rule like dictators and bully those who don't cooperate by trying to expose truths that make them look bad. Isolation and being ignored by the rest of the country are of utmost importance, Alaska is the most corrupt state in the union, but the lower forty-eight has no idea. The news media in Alaska is very reluctant to report anything negative about anyone with any power unless the governor or Department of Lawlessness directs them to do so.

8. Hire contractors to remove emails from the official accounts, especially when those snooping journalists want to read them. What the hell is wrong with you people? Sarah Palin and Sean Parnell removed emails that exposed them from the governor’s account and then removed them from the reciprocating accounts. Use some kind of NSA or military software (I watched as it worked on my account), ask Sarah Palin’s shyster psychopathic lawyers how to threaten someone to get it for your own use. Then lie your ass off about it when people complain this happened and tell people they must be crazy because who could believe a governor could be so corrupt. No, that could never happen could it Governor Christie? When sued for the emails take an inordinate amount of time to produce them because you know many people will claim their emails are missing and fuck them all.

9. Demonize the people who are doing the whistle blowing. They are the real problem here of course. Those assholes. Who do they think they are anyway? Don't they know the right wing politicians have been given special dispensation from Jesus to commit crimes, sheesh.

10. Make the lives of the whistleblowers difficult, sabotage and complicate any part of their life that you can, dig for dirt on them and contact people you can manipulate into harming them. Landords, cops, any agency they contact can all be used to accomplish this. Do it over a period of years, you may be
able to destroy them or make them very ill with a stress related disorder, hell you could even give them a severe case of PTSD.

...or not, we just made this banner in lieu of actually programs.

11. Use words instead of actual programs, such as “Respect” which can be used in place of  millions of dollars which could have been spent on programs for those who have been traumatized by your abuses of power. That money can be put to more good by allowing corporations access to it and insuring your future.

Gov psychopath #1 and #2. #1 claims to be 7 months prego in pic.
12. When those meddlesome people call about problems or to get information always have your staff at the governor’s office or agency staff, put them on terminal hold, transfer them to an inappropriate number or agency and certainly always express indignation at the complaint or request with a who the hell do you think you are attitude. Give them snark and bitchiness training so they can learn to elicit a response from the caller they can use as an excuse to hang up on them. Airheads work best for this position. Have a lawyer at the attorney general's office tell your staff to not talk to them or help them with any problems. The problem is airheads may tell those irritating constituents who complain about violations of the Constitution and crimes being committed what the attorney general staff have said, whoops. It's even funnier if the sister of the current mayor of the largest city in your state is the one who says it. Remember causing anger can lead to a swear word or a raised voice which is of course of far more grave concern than wrongfully imprisoning someone, due process in the courts or even complaints of a drunken public defender and certainly more important than having the state participating in the torture of a pet. What right do these peasants have to complain? Tisk, tisk, snark, snark, eye rollery, head shaking. 

13. Act as if FOIA/Public Records requests which could be incriminating were never received and if the issue is pushed always deny requests to decrease the cost due to public benefit along with sending three copies of everything except what the person requested. Destroy the documents this troublemaker is trying to get while they send another request. Manipulate the cost as high as possible especially if the requester is on Social Security Disability, after all it was their own poor judgement that caused their bullying, mobbing and trauma related psychological injuries when they decided to move to a state that has mega-constant-political-mobbing and severe workplace bullying due  to naiveté in thinking they lived in the United States, no it's Alaska you idiot. Really if you can't take a bit of torture from employers, landlords, drunken public defenders, corrupt judges or the Department of Corrections you have no right to be an Alaskan. You sure as hell don’t want the public to benefit from the truth, that would be nuts, let them watch FOX News instead. Make sure agencies know these FOIA rules including corrupt federal agencies such as the USDA under the control of your state 

You can't handle the public finding out the truth.
14. When the public thinks they have a right to know the character of candidates or people who have been appointed to high positions get some hack legislators to do something about those nosy assholes. What is their problem anyway. “Rep. Pete Higgins, R-Fairbanks, wants to prevent the public from seeing a complaint or evidence against a candidate or public official at the Alaska Public Officers Commission unless the watchdog agency determines the person broke the law. [Breaking the law
only counts if they were charged with a crime and the Department of Lawlessness is the decider of who gets charged, so that does not mean they did not break the law or do something unethical, it means a corrupt attorney general's office. Like say a public defender, a judge and a D.A. who conspiratorially all help get a client wrongfully arrested for retaliation a few days after an appeal is filed and then two of them get promoted. Then there are the psychopaths that assisted them and broke several laws, but were never charged for even one crime.] In addition to sealing APOC files, Higgins' bill would eliminate public hearings on complaints against candidates and public officials, sending the hearings behind closed doors.” Of course in Alaska the “Watchdog Agency” is imaginary, like that imaginary Alaskan due process unless of course you are a Palin.  Hmm, I wonder if this is in response to certain FOIA requests filed by a certain pissed off woman that were sent, but ignored. Read more about this idiocy here.

15. When you are involved in theft or misuse of money from a federal agency such as HUD or the USDA it is important to have your close friends involved and a shady former employee of the agency to show you the ins and outs. When the investigation finally happens you could just turn on them and move to another state. They know if they mention you were involved just how viciously you will retaliate. Appointing an unethical person to direct the agency to help protect you is the kind of planning that helps you escape prosecution. They must be experts at blocking questions, complaints and destroying evidence.
Someone call Geraghty, this bitch needs retaliation...oh I mean "Respect". 

16. When you resign leave a bastard with a heart blacker than yours in charge of the state. Promise him the position only if there is an agreement to protect you from your criminal activities along with your spouse and children. This is especially helpful when it comes to prostitution rings and blocking investigations at the federal level.

I'm not a bully either. What emails?

17. After you resign and perhaps spend some time in jail as it appears there are real journalists in your state and other people in power who actually want the truth revealed you can move to Arizona while claiming to live in New Jersey and start the grifting process. Start a ChristyPAC. Become a brand. Get yourself some reality shows. Wear wigs and strange shoes. Grift out your children because if they are not kept satisfied with money who knows what they might say. Become cachexic, spend hundreds of thousands on plastic surgery and wander about saying idiotic things in a special language called word-salad. Put some word-salad on Facebook to get attention and money from time to time. You can arrange for some revenge in the background.

Governor Christy I am afraid none of this will probably work out for you because of your poor planning to stomp on those who could tell the truth like Palin and Parnell do.


majii said...

Excellent! Thanks!!!

crystalwolflady said...

Great Blog post!!!! Covered pretty much everything (except the Medicare scandal) I know who can keep up with them all?
Yes the FEDS shut down Medicare in AK b/c it was so mismanaged on June 17, 2009 right before the grifter quit.
A Nurse also quit and her boss (the Dr.) when stupid wanted him to take her position, I suppose he told her where to cram it before he quit also,too, I sure hope so!

Game of Life said...

This is their plan, their playbook.

You did an excellent job in showing these assholes out. Hear! Hear!

Look at that insufferable witch, all poofed out all over the damned place. she is mentally ill.

Anonymous said...

Nice wit! I love your sense of humor. Tactful, fast reading, and blast from the past. Its heart warming reflecting on past events in our great sate of Alaska. Makes me want to be a politician in a way. Your advice could get me elected to some hi office some day......Thanks.